If I like something and find it important, I should be happy to do it

BS or fake?

Fake. So fake that it hinders our ability to do stuff. 

Picture this: 

I want to be healthy, but I feel boredom and have no mood to exercise. 

I want to learn a new language, but I don’t feel like starting. 

I want a new job, but I don’t know where to start. 

Our brains love comfort. They consume so much energy, that anything that is extra will require more energy and that is not good for surviving. 

However, we are sentient beings and sometimes want our lives to be better. 

How do you get out of this conundrum?

So if you ever felt guilty because you wanted to do something that is important to you but just feel like it, don’t feel bad. We all do this. 

The difference between people who manage to do difficult things and those who feel bad is their ability to make room for negative feelings and discomfort & connection to their values. 

Let me explain. 

Values: I talked about values here. They are chosen directions in life. They are the behaviors you want to have towards yourself, others & the world. 

Values work like a compass. When you want to do something important to you, first ask yourself:

Why is this important to me? What is this leading me towards?

Let’s say you want to learn something new. And you are dreading it. 

But why do you want to learn that? What is it taking you to? 

Maybe you value curiosity. Or professional growth. Or financial security. 

Those are the things you are going towards. 

Do you want to learn so that you don’t fall behind? Why? Why is it important to you to be successful? 

Are you running away from a bear or are you running a marathon?

Pain & discomfort: these are natural human feelings. But, you can find yourself feeling clean pain or dirty pain. 

Clean pain is the pain that you are feeling when doing something that requires effort. 

Dirty pain is the pain you are feeling when you are avoiding discomfort. 

Clean pain is the difficulty when you want to write a smart piece on substack (no connection to me, ofc)

Dirty pain is the anger at yourself for not doing it. 

Clean pain is the boredom you are feeling when you want to go out for a run/ walk/ workout. 

Dirty pain is the guilt you feel when you don’t that usually leads to bingeing on the couch. 

See the difference? 

Values + clean pain = doing stuff

Disconnect from values + dirty pain = not doing stuff & more negative stuff. 

So, what do you want to do?